C, X, & Q

english is much, much too confuzzling in many ways. spelling is definitely one of them and i will complain about that later. but today i don't care so much about spelling. today i am going to make a fuss about the alphabet. particularly about the letters C, X, and Q.

ok. these are all stupid, pointless letters. why do they exist? they do us no good. let's talk about C. we could just get rid of it! and we should! whenever i tell people this, those who either aren't thinking about it enough or are thinking too hard, all ask the same dumb question. "then how would you spell cat?" where is your brain?!??! K-A-T!! duh! then some try to get me to admit that we need C. they ask "how would you spell things with a CH in them?" well, CH, TH, PH, and SH are stupid anyway. i mean, think about it. they don't even make the sounds they look like they should. K could just be used instead of the C. then it would be KH and it would be just as stupid but at least C would be gone. after that all you have to do is replace C with a K or S depending on the word. PH is the dumbest of all the pointless letter combination things. it should sound something like puh-huh (say this out loud really quick but say it like you're whispering very quietly and don't use your voice.... go ahead........ see what i mean?) instead it makes a ffffffff sound. so F should be used instead of PH which should be gotten rid of.
moving on...

X is the same as C, it should not exist. so, while we're at it let's remove X from the alphabet. all Xs get replaced by KS and Z. (ya know what's great? because C is already gone, no one has to worry about X being replaced with CS in certian words!!) i'm assuming i don't need to eksplain that any further.

OK!! now that we're rid of C and X, let's move on to Q...

IT'S STUPID!! need i say more?

by now i'm sure you've become much smarter then you were 15 minutes ago. so let's not bother with any big long expanations. bye-bye Q, hello KW, bye also to U, who for some reason is always clinging to Q like velcro to........ itself. so, KW, yes! KWU, no!

well, i think we have fiksed the alphabet kwite a bit, don't you? a fantastik improvement, i say.